… and he said…

Be grateful for hardship & bad people. Obstacles are an essential part of training.-Morihei Ueshiba, founder of Aikido

There are many times when hardship and ‘bad people’ are sent along our my way and more often than not, we I, wince, grumble, despair and whatever else negative reactions there are to be exuded, you name it, I’ve displayed it.

In martial arts, as I’ve grown to understand– is that when the villain comes to attack, that is when our strength and skills will be tested to its fullest. Without them, there won’t be a gauge of how competent we are in the path that we have pursued. And that goes in line with what my faith teaches me, that He won’t test us anymore than we can take and that after each hardship, there are two relieves. Hence hardship and difficult people are all part of our trainings to make us stronger. Just like the concept of villains in martial arts.

Blogs are usually filtered by its writers and on most occasions, only the good stuffs are put forward for others to read. Likewise in this space here, which has been an outlet of sorts for me to detox. As it is, our lives ( mine and my mister’s ) here are not perfect or all that rosy. We have been through some extreme challenges on personal, financial, domestic, studies and career levels. But because our faith forbids us to publicly talk about anything negative ( where the prophet said that if we have nothing good to say, it is better to keep quiet ), this blog here may seem at times, reflects all the nice, rosy and cosy aspects of life that we lead here.

The truth be known, we have met many of life’s ‘villains’ and ‘bad people’ and ‘obstacles’ along the way. Too many in fact. Initially it did get us down to the pits and we fell into the traps that so many people have fallen into i.e painting ourselves as the victims of circumstances. Of late, however through martial arts, we have learnt that is a very lame thing to do. Every opponent is supposed to make us rise to the occasion, not downcast us into meek lambs.

O-sensei Morihei Ueshiba used to train aikido in the forest at night and this was when he was already quite aged. The darkness of the forest at night made it extremely tough for him to see the oncoming opponents, especially if they come from all different directions. That mode of training was extremely tough and not for the faint hearted. But because it was that tough, it made him that good. Worthy of what his title was before he passed away– the O-sensei.

So now that my mister is done with his post grad course, I feel a bit sentimental. I looked back at the obstacles and the hardship we have gone through, the struggles we have had throughout the whole journey and survived it together, I can’t help but realized that it has definitely made our relationship stronger and firmer. By His grace, he  landed himself a cushy job here hence the plan to leave won’t be materialized. Our next chapter will still be here. And as O-sensei pointed out,  I am indeed grateful for all the hardships that we have gone through. Today it is reaffirmed in me that all those were essential parts of my life’s training, and through them, I can only become stronger.

Behind the faces

Over news yesterday, world leaders are encouraged to join facebook to see the flow of conversation on what the laymen/general public wants, what they are voicing out and think of them( the world leaders ) . And perhaps Najib would soon have facebook too as I read today in BH. On that note, I used to follow K/J on twitter but I stopped, because too many updates I get dizzy. Last week,  I had a good feeling of deactivating my facebook altogether, nothing more to it, just that it was becoming a tad too distracting.

When I first came to know about facebook, sure. I was excited like hell. Along with it were reconnections with friends whom I have not seen since primary school, or long lost buddies since secondary school and people I met  through different chapters of my life. Then there were also the old stories which are best forgotten, but somehow reappeared on the face of, yeah… you guess it, facebook. So then began the frenzy phase of adding and adding, people whom I knew and whom were once friends, whom appeared in my life in one way or another, who remembered me and wanted to reconnect.. whatever. It was fun initially. Exciting even to know about and to share with the people whom once upon a time crossed path with you or were once in your life.

Then, as all fad goes, the peak of excitement goes down. I realized that the initial reconnection were just temporarily fun and exciting. Then wham! It sank upon me that there were the downsides to it as well. It is the platform of the latest ‘news’ on who’s doing what and who’s up to what. The lines of privacy became dimmer and dimmer and in many cases, thanks to all these social networking sites, it may even disappear altogether.

While it is good that initiatives are taken for the world leaders to connect to the general public via these social networking sites, I question whether it would be of the best possible interest of the leaders in the long run. Not to support feudalism, but I am of the opinion that excessive ‘casualness’ between the leaders and followers would somehow or the other, destroy the  esteem given to our leaders when there no longer exist social demarcation between them and us. And when that happens, we begin to lose that respect that we once give to our leaders, elected or otherwise.

Like myself, who expresses freely on facebook only to realise that my students and ex students ceased taking me seriously anymore.They think it is ok to be treating me just like one of them, joke and make comments like one of their kind ( because via FB they see me joking with my friends and peers in the happy go lucky jovial manner ). And they do likewise, and it sometimes really reach the point of disrespect, forgetting I am/was their teacher. Would we reach that point with our leaders??? Since  now that we are going to have the same direct access to them? Where do we draw the line then? Can we still see them as leaders and speak to them in full decorum ?

On that record, I hardly have any of my students in my contact list anymore. It is more for personal friends whom have been with me throughout and family members. The world is getting a bit too huge  and in a nutshell ( that sounds oxymoronic ) it is making me a little uncomfortable.

Two of a kind

Something which I gobbled up in two days, prior to the catastrophe of having my pc hanged up on me during a downloading session, which in turn destroyed some really important files.

I like that the book was written in the perspectives of different characters in the story and the plot development was seamless. It raised the parenting factor very well, on how far would parents go for the benefit of saving their child’s life while risking the life of another. A real tear-jerker this one. I shouldn’t be reading since I have so much translation to redo, but I couldn’t put it down.

Now I really need to get this book I am translating done so I can read the Time Traveller’s Wife. I hate it that this technological breakdown is costing me the European Film Festival. I am determined to catch at least one, Cherry Blossoms from Germany. At least…

On a different note altogether, I was watching the Rozz and Shan shows on You Tube while translating at the same time last night. I was watching that episode of them interviewing Ris Low. Yes that BOOMZ and now SHINGZ Ris Low. Suddenly, I pity her. Hilarious that her oblivion to all these punishing media hoo-haa may be, I simply wonder. Like… does she even realize that the whole nation is making fun of her?

The father, the son and the sparrow…

Trivia

Now that I am still into my baking frenzy phase ( much, much appreciated by the dojo mates who are the sole recipients of the products of my baking projects ) I have a nagging question unanswered.

What’s the difference ( other than the prices/packaging/import tax rate ) between French butter/Australian butter/Irish butter/Danish butter/Dutch butter and Italian butter?

Do they serve specific functions for specific recipes? I’ve tried baking cookies with Australian butter ( ScS) and it turned out good. Like how good chocolate chip cookies supposed to taste like. Last night I tried baking a loaf with Irish butter, it was moist but taste wise, it tasted like err, Banana Loaf? Like duh…How am I supposed to know the differing tastes to butters in recipes, if there are any significant differences at all?

Err, help?

Luck be a lady tonight

I don’t believe in all these bad luck thing about Friday the 13th, but coincidently, I got a foul piece of luck today. Last night my computer hanged while I was downloading something from online. It happened while I was translating and the whole word document, although periodically auto-saved, also went off when I had to restart the computer.

Lo and behold, when I tried to retrieve the file, it was gone as in REALLY gone. That’s 3 chapters of translation. The feeling is worse than breaking up with a boyfriend, I swear.

It’s about time

I’ve not read the book but have seen trailers on this movie directed by Brad Pitt. I think it was nice, nothing awesomely fantastic but not too bad either. It did, however, make me want to read the book.

Overall, ( because I didn’t read the book ) I find the plot interesting, especially since it explores the possibility of time travelling quite craftily sans the humor that was Michael J Fox’s Back to the Future. I like the way it explores the husband and wife relationship them and the impossibility of changing any part of the past, no matter how much one tries. It’s like living a life of flashbacks, re-experiencing the past through the subconscious mind and relearning the mistakes from it but knowing it cannot be prevented or corrected because it has already happened.

Speaking of which, if given the chance, would I like to time travel? Sure. If I can change certain things when I travel back in time, that would be even better. Like perhaps, be kinder but firmer to my parents. Waste less time and learn more skills perhaps instead of being too playful and rebelling with lofty out-of-the-box ideals, pursue my path earlier instead of trying to go with the flow. I would have also left that island earlier had I known the bountiful and endless opportunities and limitless doors of experiences waiting for me in this vast, vast world minus the glass ceiling on that tiny island. Oh I think there would be a long list of things I would want to correct, but like the Henry character, I can’t. So all I can draw from my past are the lessons learnt from the mistakes made and appreciate the positive things that came out of it. Other than that, what has passed, is gone forever.

But like Claire and Henry, there are things that I would never ever want changed. Like my family. Like my buddies. Like my husband. I wouldn’t change or correct those for a million years. It’s about time they know that their presence in my life is timeless.

Oh on a different note, today 12 November is the time for 2009 European Film Festival. There are about 15 participating films these year and by the synopsis, all seems awesome. It’s time to catch some.

Before I knock off for the day, I just remembered how I used to ( dramatically so I must admit ) teach my students back in school about the importance of Time. I found that Surah Al Asr’ where HE presented the concept of Time to be very precise, but I couldn’t be telling those to a group of primary school children in a Chinese school. Perhaps if I did, I would be made to ’spend time’ in ISA detention for preaching in the classroom. So I thought long and hard on how to let the kids see the importance of Time in a graphic way that they will remember for life.

I would always do this near the exam period, for a more dramatic impact heh . I gave each of them a piece of pure white paper. Then I asked them to list out all the things that can be done with that white paper, which can produce a positive result/impact. So children being children, they came out with a list of so many ideas like make a card and give it to someone, turn it into paper aeroplane with kind words inside and then shoot the paper aeroplane to your best friends, draw and paint on it and hang it on the wall for soothing effect etc etc. Very good, I told them.

Then the next minute, I told all of them to tear their piece of white paper into pieces. Into tiny pieces. Basically shred and shred them until all they had were scraps of paper. They were puzzled, but the herd mentality they had, they just followed without questions. After each of them ended up with their shredded mess, I told them that I would give them 10 minutes for them to return me the original piece of white paper that I gave them because it is mine. And I DO NOT want the shredded piece, I want that original piece of white paper back in its original state.

Of course they yelped and yelled that they couldn’t. I mean I knew I am loony, but I never expected them to be able to anyway. Hence that was when I went for the cut in. To drive that message in. I told them that piece of white paper represents TIME. There are so many things they can do with TIME for positive results just like the numerous things they can do with the piece of white paper. I showed them that when they waste time, it is like them shredding the white paper. They can never get that whole piece back. Time is like that, I told them. Once they wasted it, it will never come back and along with it, they waste the potential of doing so many good and positive things that they could have done, had they not wasted time.

Now that I look back in time, I thought, alamak…that was so drama. heh. As if I don’t waste time .  If procrastination is a thief of time, then I am a compulsive thief!

On that note, it’s past 1 am and what time is it? It’s TIME to sleep. Guten nach!

True Budo

From O-sensei Morihei Ueshiba,  founder of Aikido

A true warrior is invincible because he or she contests with nothing

Gossip Man

Move aside Gossip Girl.

At the risk of sounding like a  feminist bigot, I want to nitpick on a certain species today which goes by the name of man(kind). In particular, about men and the gossip syndrome. The husband once told me, men don’t gossip. I beg to differ as I observe otherwise.

In the mornings, I like to take a walk around the neighborhood shops. There are several coffeeshops and mamak joints. The whole scene is just there for the perfect Gossip Man setting. Just walking through and passing by and then walk alongside the tables. There are usually tables of men. Most of them with ciggies enough to make them look like chimneys, teh/kopi tarik, roticanai/nasi lemak.OR, do likewise in the late afternoons. Other than the morphing of roti canai/nasi lemak into karipap/goreng pisang, the setting AND the activities are pretty much the same.And listen to them do that very thing they darn the women best for –gossiping. Yes, they gossip!

Oh but of course, they will never ever admit to gossiping ( in female term, it’s bitching), but listen to them go on and on about this politician and that politician! Listen to them go on a detailed analysis of the latest political saga. They are more detailed, I think than the average psychologist from FBI. Listen to them and their ‘intellectual’ gestures when they opiniate, analyse, argue, name drop, boomed and exaggerate. A phenomena, no?

A girlfriend defined this observation for me today. That this IS a form of male gossip, ( which in most instances the world over, they swear upon their mother’s grave they don’t do ). Another girlfriend calls it the NATO syndrome, the No Action Talk Only–which is the basis of this post, on these men, who talk and talk and talk till the cows not only fly but they have started to form a colony in space– are all just that, political talk but no action.

In reality, most of these coffee shop political “champions” do very little or nothing at all, to get down to the ground level of improving the social situation with their ‘holier-than-those-crappy-politician-souls-whom-they-loudly-judge-and-criticize-about’ selves. Man, get off from those mamaks and look around. So many things to be done, which you have loudly chided the politicians for not doing. Like first of all, go and pick up after your own litters! And then go and learn driving properly instead of always trying to murder a pedestrian or another motorist. And then spend time with your kids by teaching them not to emulate the politicians you vehemently judge and show them by example. Or, help the mat rempit kids back to education…and..  oh the list goes on and on. And sitting around in mamak joints wasting time in political gossips won’t save our future, dudes!

And it is not only here mind you. Male friends back home, don’t snigger. This is for you too. Fancy all of you obsessing and gossiping about Malaysian politics and then whine about the lack of it in SG. There are things to do there too, which you yourselves know better since children are getting battered and killed by stressed parents, maids abused, teenage pregnancies rising…

Mahatma Gandhi puts it nicely when he said ” Be the change you want to see”

Unfortunately, our men instead of leading us towards that change, choose to gossip instead.

That (English) thing you do

I have never been a fan of floral motifs in fabrics and wallpapers. And laces. I find it so makcik ‘ropol-ropol’… But of course, if done tastefully in the English cottage kinda theme, it can look quite nice ( quite, but still not to my liking ). Hence I was never tempted to do the tea time thingy at WinterWarmers, no matter how many reviews have been said about its quaintness and delicious English inspired food especially the lovely scones, homemade jams, lavendar cheesecakes– the whole works.

But yesterday, a friend who was in a way or another responsible for my achievement in getting my license to translate, wanted to meet for tea there, at WinterWarmers. Her 8 years working in England has Anglonised her tastebuds for all things English, and yes— including the florals and ‘ropol-ropol’ laces. And since WinterWarmers is 5 min from home, I was ok with the idea.

I didn’t eat anything as I was from a lunch gathering but what I had, and the array of things found in the menu made me oblivious to its ‘mak-mak British setting’. I had Rose Ice Latte, and it was lovely. Simply lovely. Like the English Rose

There were things on the menu like an array of scones with homemade jams/mini sandwiches served on multi-tier quaint tea set with errm yes…floral prints.

And so I have discovered that no matter how I find laces and florals ‘obit’, the food and the service at WinterWarmers will lure me back there. With girlfriends of course, for tete-a-tete while ‘berfeeling’ English tai-tai.