The thing is…

I went to there train.

But then, when I sit and comtemplate like right now in the wee hours of the morning about what I have learnt during training, the techniques actually are the the last things which are on my mind. Instead, I learnt more than what I went there for. I learnt to let go of my inhibitions. I learnt to overcome my fears. I learnt to really, really crush my ego. I learnt to focus on fundamentals. I learnt not to be ‘ye ye orh’. I learnt to be flexible. I learnt that there is no shame in making mistakes while learning although the whole class is watching me in the most undesirable positions and jatuh macam nangka busuk. Most importantly, I learnt about myself, my strength and weaknesses. I learnt humility in ways I can never imagine I would.

The husband mentioned in passing today that aikido is so much aligned to sufism. Just that it is non-tauhidic. Maybe it is too early for me to make the same kind of observation. Too many things I do not know about. But what I know, and what I have gone through is like a new journey I never thought I would be making. And I love it  too.

It’s O-sensei’s founders day today. I don’t want to end up hero worshipping him. But as the founding father of Aikido, he had indeed did something right in that area.

Hot night man.. sweltering hot. I am perspiring as though I had just finished training. But that was hours ago and I showered right after that. And now I am perspiring again.

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